Monday, July 28, 2014

The Undercover smoker


For so many of us, who have had a moderately conservative upbringing, to be identified as a smoker is almost  a matter of confession, or coming out. Almost alike  following a conflicting religious belief or sexual orientation. And many smokers go to great lengths to hide this fact from their families & loved ones. 

But its a habit, and so people who smoke, smoke even if they have to hide it from the  rest of the world. And find unique ways to conceal this habit from their abode. 

Hiding your pack of cigarettes is covert operation which involves concealing, camouflage, a keen sense of smell and  lots of ventilation. My pack, is hidden neatly in a pen stand concealed under a cluster of symmetrically arranged pens, and locked away in the lowest drawer of my study table. And I am confident that this position is unassuming enough to avoid any undesirable attention and that getting caught is highly unlikely. Some of my friends however have more extreme ways of hiding their packs of cigarettes and more, with one digging a hole in his garden and another hiding it under the top cover of  the cistern. 

But really, it is that intangible element, which is lot more bothersome, than the placement of the packages. The odor is the worst enemy of the undercover smoker. It is because of this potent force that, each and every session has to be followed by a painstaking investigation followed by a meticulous cover up. Apart from that, the inventory for essentials, such as, mint chewingum & deodorant has to carefully maintained and you can't use a room freshener, because it just combines with the smoke and makes for a perfectly obvious cover-up. The only thing that can get rid of the smoke is ventilation. You can only allow some fresh air to pass thorough  your room, and hope for the best.

I am afraid, however, no matter how much effort you  behind a coverup, getting caught at last is quiet inevitable. A lone discarded cigarette bud will finally manage to loose your attention, and will end up somewhere, it is not supposed to be. Or, eventually, someone else is going to tell you that, every thing in your room, for example your books and clothes etc, smells of cigarettes. You may be too used to the smell, but the smell will stand out for everyone else that you are living with.

So, you'd rather tell everyone that you  smoke, because they know already. You'd rather come out and then..... QUIT!!